Michael Rosenbaum, an ordained minister and spiritual counselor, says he’s seeing a growing trend among engaged couples. “So many of them these days don’t want a traditional, formal religious ceremony for their wedding,” he says. “They are looking for something more personal, meaningful and spiritual.”

He offers several tips for creating a memorable ceremony, beginning with the officiate. “Pick someone who is open to creating the ceremony together with you, built around what is important and meaningful to you.”

Couples should also decide in advance the direction of the ceremony, including whether to have spiritual references or keep it more secular, Rosenbaum says. They should also consider writing their own vows instead of using traditional ones.

“You can add to the genuine emotion of the event by keeping the vows a surprise until the ceremony,” he says.

To get started, he suggests using a book with different ceremony ideas, like Daphne Rose Kingma’s Weddings from the Heart. He also likes the idea of involving other people in the ceremony by inviting them to present a reading or prayer, or simply share their wisdom.

“I officiated at a wedding recently where the couple gave seven words—like commitment, sharing and love—to seven different friends and family and had them share about them as part of the ceremony. It had an amazing effect,” he says.

For more information about creating an inspirational wedding ceremony, contact Rosenbaum at 914.589.3601 or [email protected].